A house where many married brothers live and eat together but........their hearts are not so clear for each other. The conflicts increase each day. And jealousy keep rising every day.
Syed Abid Hussain Zaidi
Father and Mother in law, or other people living in the house should recite Surah Baqarah and do dum on other members of the house because Holy Prophet (PBUH) said: ?”I swear upon Allah who has Muhammad’s (PBUH) soul in his hands, Devil cannot stay in that house where Surah Baqarah is recited”. So, if you want the fights at home to reduce, protection from the devil is necessary, and is the protection from all the things that attract the devil to your home and all the things that keep the devil away should be performed. One of these things is the recitation of Surah Baqarah. Father and Mother-in-law and other members of the house should often recite the Holy Quran with its translation, because it is written in the Ahadith that”the house where Holy Quran is recited often, angels enter it and devils get out of it, and the house where the recitation of the Divine Book decreases, angels start moving out of it and devils get inside”. The son who is able to buy his own house should be advised to move out after marriage. It is not necessary that everybody should live together in one house.
Respected Father and Mother in law! Cooking in one vessel will bring more blessings to the house, but every day’s fights will cause hatred and jealousy and these will keep the house from getting the Divine’s blessings. Inviting all these problems for one such blessing is not what the wise recommend. A house where many married brothers live and eat together but hearts are not clean for each other, jealousy keeps rising every day. At night when the husbands come home from work, wives start backbiting about each other which causes distance among brothers. The germs of back biting, bad mouthing and lying spread and cause bigger spiritual diseases in the house. The son is being taken away from mother and sister. A wife is blackmailing to take divorce and leave the house, mother-in-law is concerned about ”taveez”. Father-in-law is ill-praying after every prayer. Mother-in-law of the man or woman is talking bad about their family with everyone. Some members have to visit the psychological institutes due to small issues in the house. It is difficult to protect your children from haram, dish antenna and cable. On the other hand, there is a house, in which a wedding is organized which is simple, free from lavishness and extravaganza. Save money from such show-offs and get yourself a separate house; be it a small house or a flat; where you gain more prayers of parents by living separately. Sister-in-laws and brother-in-laws’ wives respect each other. There is affection amongst the ladies of the house. Children are getting good manners. Daily or frequent visits are made. Gifts are exchanged according to the affordability. Food is cooked and brought for father and mother in laws. Younger kids have love among each other.
Both the lifestyles and their consequences are in front of you. Which lifestyle would you prefer? The decision is yours to make. The things that are not considered bad in the divine shariah, don’t think of them as bad, and the things that are acceptable in shariah, don’t make them a punctuality for yourselves. But unfortunately or in some cases due to your ego, your son and his wife have to take divorce. So isn’t it better to tell them to live separately before they fall apart? No matter how many divorces take place, how many houses fall apart, how many lives get destroyed, how many brothers and sisters stop talking with each other, will your decision still be the same? Islamic shari’ah has said for the daughter-in-law to serve her father and mother in laws, but it hasn’t made this something which is a must necessarily be done and serving brother in law and sister’s husband is not appropriate in Islam, so when she isn’t really supposed to do all this, will you force her to do this? This very thinking is the cause of all the fights and chaos.
Likeminded Sons and Daughters-in-law: If you want a son to live with you, and you want to see your grandchildren in your house, you should keep the son and wife with whom you can connect, and keep on praying for them.
Separate Kitchen: If due to monetary or other causes, you have to keep the daughter-in-laws in one house, then at least you should make separate entrances for them and the kitchens must necessarily be separated.
Good Manners and a Happy Demeanor: If father and mother-in-law are well mannered, they can have their daughter-in-law to serve them with a good heart. It is the”saadat” of the daughter-in-law and good mannerism of her father and mother-in-law, but forcefully making your daughter-in-law serve you is not allowed in the Islamic Shari’ah. Try respecting your daughter in law, she will serve you better than your daughter.
